It’s been three months since I left my full-time corporate job. So why am I still having tension headaches? Why am I busier than ever? Why am I racing to yoga so I can slow down when I get there?
My coach Dr. F says that “while I am semi-retired I’m still acting like the Type A person I’ve been for the past 35+ years.”
Life Reimagined - I spent time at the AARP Booth at the BlogHer conference with boomer blogger Patricia Patton and AARP consultant Carole Ricks. We asked attendees to tell us all the fun and playful things they want to do during their second act.
I don’t have to keep up the fast-paced lifestyle anymore, I don’t need to reach the top of the mountain, or climb the tallest ladder of success or even get dressed every morning to play the part. However, what I do need to do is give myself permission to change. After losing my spouse, selling my house, emptying out my nest, leaving my job and most recently losing my mom – it’s time to take care of myself. Time to renew, refresh and reimagine my life – mind, body and spirit.
Dr. F says I should schedule “play time” into each day. I just read an article about “play” in the July issue of “O” The Oprah Magazine. It features an interview with Natalie Rusk of MIT Media Lab’s Lifelong Kindergarten Group.
Natalie says that “play teaches us to relax, explore, connect.” She says that “A really great yoga teacher will help you approach the poses in a spirit of delight. Play is also a great way to learn about resilience. When a child plays, she fails and revises.” (My yoga teachers N and P encourage us to relax, explore and connect during each class. No wonder I like yoga so much. Yoga is a practice, so it’s okay if I cannot strike a pose correctly or touch my toes – it’s only me and my mat – no competition.)
Natalie says that to bring more play into my everyday life I must “start by giving myself permission. And then do it, even if it feels silly.” (Ooh, ooh, ooh, didn’t I just use that “permission” word earlier – I think I am ready for a play date. First step done.)
Natalie shares some fun ways to increase play:
– “Engage the senses: Eat blindfold, roll down a hill, blow bubbles, make crazy mouth noises. Go to a toy store and buy the most appealing blocks and then see what you can do with them.” (I love blowing bubbles. I haven’t blown bubbles since my kids A and D were toddlers. I am definitely going to buy some bubbles and schedule some bubble time into my day.)
– “Use play to figure things out: If you’re struggling to explain something, try expressing your ideas with a sketch. Go hang out with kids for an afternoon.” (Okay, I think I will get a sketch pad and express myself in non-verbal ways. I’ll have to find some kids on the beach to boogie board with me when I am at my condo on the corner at the shore. Or maybe I’ll see if my boyfriend L will boogie board with me.)
– “Above all, create. Look at the stars and make up new constellations, then tell their stories. When you see something that doesn’t work, brainstorm ways to fix it. The materials for play are available – you just have to change how you approach them.” (Sounds like I do need to change my approach during my life after 50. Sounds like I should slow down and add more play time into my day time and maybe my night time too.)
Life Reimagined. Since I am a member of the AARP Kitchen Cabinet of Caregivers, I plan to also check out the new “Life Reimagined” idea from AARP. It’s a single source for tools – both online and in person – that helps people who want to pursue a passion or take a new direction and navigate change. (That’s me. That’s me. That’s me.) The online tools are available at www.lifereimagined.org. if you want to join me.
For now, I can’t wait to go and play. Think I will count some sheep to help me fall asleep – I used to play this game when I was a kid. If I can’t fall asleep maybe I will play a round of Boggle or play with my magnetic YOGA poetry kit. What fun!
Judi
Note: I am a member of AARP’s blogger kitchen cabinet on caregiving issues. All opinions are my own.
Judy,
So great meeting you the other night. I think we probably have a lot to talk about, but for now I want to say you deserve to kick back, enjoy and live your passions! That’s the greatest gift you can give to yourself.
Wonderful post
Cathy, wonderful to meet you too and all the boomers! Thanks for your support as I continue to reinvent my life during my second act.
Sorry I misspelled your name in my last response – JUDI!
Hi Judi
Indeed your observations are on point . Seriously you do need to give yourself a break so that you can learn how to play and/or do nothing. I do not profess to be an expert but my experience confirms this. I really had to learn how to live a different life once I left the 9-5 never ending grind.
Thanks for your advice Pat. I know it is going to take time to change my lifestyle, especially after 35+ years of working 9 – 5 and even more most days.
This post is SO powerful, so inspiring, so filled with fabulous ideas that I’ve had to read it several times. I try to “play” every single day. I really, really do. Whether its slurping ice cream that’s running down my hand or going for a run in the rain, it’s PLAY that returns me to the art of living… a second chance to be a kid on wild, fun, sometimes forbidden adventures. Thank you for this beautiful, powerful post. You will change lives today…
Sharon, thanks for your kind words. I am on a journey of self discovery during the second half of my life. I plan to go get my bubbles this weekend!