According to Oprah, “life is better when you share it.  So keep widening that circle.”  That’s why I am going to share all that I learned at Dr. Oz’s session at the “O” Magazine Live Your Best Life Weekend that I attended earlier this month. 

As I sit here in my kitchen, eating my fat-free ice cream (with a few high-fat chocolate chips that I sprinkled on top of the ice-cream), I’ve been thinking about what Dr. Oz, America’s Doctor and host of The Dr. Oz Show, who is also Vice-Chair and Professor of Surgery at Columbia University as well as directing the Cardiovascular Institute & Complementary Medicine Program at NY Presbyterian, said during his hour long session.  I was eager to hear what he had to say about living longer. He has written several books on the subject, including You: Staying Young: The Owner’s Manual for Extending Your Warranty, and is a very smart doctor.

“It’s not about living longer. It’s about living better,” said Dr. Oz. (Okay, Dr. Oz, I do want to live a better life. I do. I really do.)

“People change their lives on what they feel, not on the facts.  Sometimes you have to act and then you get motivated,” said Dr. Oz. (Tell me more. Tell me more.)

“If you make five-just five-adjustments to your life, you can have a dramatic effect on your life expectancy and the quality of your life,” explained Dr. Oz. (Ooh, this sounds simple.  Just five adjustments – surely I can do all five. Dr. Oz made everything sound so simple.)

What are the five adjustments?

1. Control your blood pressure. 115 over 75 is optimal blood pressure. (Okay, I think I can do that.  However, my pressure may have been elevated this week due to a certain animal that decided to take up camp under my house.  “I think you have a groundhog burrowing under your garage,” said my exterminator J during his monthly checkup.  “Come take a look.”  There it was, a big hole in the mulch.  I felt like Alice in Wonderland.  If  I could have shrunken down into a tiny Judi, I would have slipped in the hole and asked the groundhog to remove himself from my property immediately. Instead, J set up a trap. To date, the only animal that the trap has trapped is a cute little bunny.  I hope the groundhog appears before next February when it’s time to see his shadow because I need to control my blood pressure…and furthermore, I want to sell my house.)

2. Stop smoking. (Oh good.  This is an easy adjustment because I have never smoked.)

3. Exercise 30 minutes a day. (Tonight, I went to the gym and worked out with my weights and went on the treadmill for 25 minutes.  I promise next time I will make an adjustment and stay on the treadmill for an extra 5 minutes.  But, what about all the other days of the week?  Let’s see, I do yoga on Tuesdays.  I try to get to the gym on Sundays.  I take walks on the beach or ride my bicycle on Saturdays and Sundays when I’m at my condo on the corner at the shore during the spring, summer and fall.  There are still more days in the week.  I better adjust my schedule and get those stationery bicycle pedals working again. Plus, Dr. Oz said that women who go through menopause lose muscle, so we have to work harder and build back up our muscles.)

4. Keep a healthy diet. Dr. Oz said that conventional diets don’t work because they depend on willpower.  He said you should focus on your waist size.  Your waist should be your height divided by two. Do you know that the bigger your belly fat the more pressure it puts on your kidneys, poisons your liver and blocks insulin, which can cause diabetes? (Dr. Oz scared me so that when I arrived home I went right out and took my tape measure and put it around my waist right above my belly button like Dr. Oz said to do.  The tape measure said 29 inches. My height is 63 inches. Half of 63 is 31.5. Yes, yes, yes. OMG! I’m soooo happy.)

5. Control stress. Dr. Oz said practices like yoga and meditation can help ease stress. “Most of us store tension in our jaw and hips,” explained Dr. Oz. (I only do my yoga once or twice a week. And I did take mindfulness meditation, but don’t always practice it. I promise to do better.  Now, if that groundhog would leave my property like a nice groundhog should, I would be able to control my stress level a bit better.)

Dr. Oz ended the session by encouraging the audience (of mostly women) that one of the most important things we can do to help us stay young is to get enough sleep.  “Deep sleep increases growth hormones,” he said. (I wish I could surrender to sleep like Dr. Oz described.  I have to turn off my computer and let my brain relax  at least 30 minutes before I go to sleep and keep my room cool – just like Dr. Oz said to do. I  need to continue to build a better sleep routine so I can increase my growth hormones.)

What’s that you say Dr. Oz?  I need to take some vitamins too?  Okay, I will.  Which ones?

Dr. Oz says that women my age should take a multi-vitamin with vitamins A to E, minerals including calcium, magnesium, selenium and zinc, plus get omega 3 with fish oils.  (I take a multi-vitamin every morning and I also take fish oil at night.)

In closing, Dr. Oz said that “if you automate your life differently, in two weeks you should know if this works for you. It will become part of your normal life.”

I’m going to try Dr. Oz.  Yes, I’m really, really going to try to make these simple adjustments and live a better life. However, if you could just ask the groundhog to leave my property, it would be a whole lot easier.
Judi 

I was especially lucky this Mother’s Day weekend to spend time not only with my wonderful daughter A, but with my wonderful daughter A at a wonderful mother-daughter weekend.  You see, I took my daughter A to the Live Your Best Life Weekend to celebrate the 10th Anniversary of “O” magazine in New York City. (Okay, okay, okay, I also spent Friday with my son D. I was very proud of myself as I navigated the city streets to move him out of his dorm without getting a parking ticket.  And I spent Sunday evening with D too, welcoming him back home for the summer.  There goes my empty nest for the next several months! I do love my son D, even if he did take my bottle of Dove soap out of my shower and forget to put it back on Monday morning.  Who needs soap any way? So what if he left an empty iced tea bottle in the refrigerator on Monday evening.Why would I want a full bottle of green tea sitting in my refrigerator all day any way? I can drink warm tea with my dinner or no tea at all. Whatever. It’s all cool)

 “O” magazine is a relatively new magazine in my magazine repetoire. (how could I resist since the subscription was only $5 for the year, what a bargain…right? Even if  I don’t read the entire magazine every month, it is still a great magazine. And I share it with my friends.)

When I read about this special weekend with Oprah and all her life-changing experts, I registered the minute the tickets went on sale on March 15th.  I knew it would be a fabulous way to spend Mother’s Day weekend. And since I was going to stay at my daughter A’s NYC apartment during the weekend, I decided to purchase a ticket and take her along. 

I learned so much from Oprah and her life experts. And there is so much I want to share with each of you.  Yes, I do. I do. I do.

Oprah was amazing.  She had so many quotes I wanted to savor as she welcomed everyone on Saturday morning.  “You must fill your cup first so that your cup will over flow and reach others,” she said as she welcomed the thousands of women, and a few men too, who had each come, like me, as Oprah said “to be a seeker in search of my best self.”

“There’s a special guest on the agenda today,” said Oprah.  “It’s Elizabeth Gilbert.”  Ooh, aah.  I was so excited. Elizabeth Gilbert authored one of my favorite books, “Eat, Pray, Love.” I read her book cover to cover and many of the pages several times after my husband died a few years ago.  I so wanted to go to Italy to eat, India to pray and Indonesia to fall in love again, just like Elizabeth did in that book and in real life.

I felt like Elizabeth was talking directly to me, as she shared her philosophy and tips on living life to the fullest.

“Do you see your life as a series of final exams that you have to pass every day, instead of a journey?” said Elizabeth.  (Yes, I sometimes do feel like my life is a series of final exams.  In fact, at this point I feel like I’m not passing the “sell my house” exam.  I wish I could get a passing grade on this test, so I could downsize or right size my living quarters, give up my bamboo backyard and not have to worry about sump pumps and basements anymore.)

“We long to have someone help us solve our life,” Elizabeth stated.  “Our lives are journeys that no one can solve for us.” According to Elizabeth, we listen to speakers like her and others and watch reality shows and read blogs and memoirs to “find clues on how others solve problems” in the hopes that we will learn how to solve our own problems.

“But, we are each unique,” she added. ”Our lives don’t look like the lives of the women who came before us.” (What you say is so true, so true.  However, I still would like to eat my way through Italy and go do some yoga and meditation in India…just like you did.  Maybe someday, even if it doesn’t solve all my problems.  Maybe if I ever sell my house or maybe when I retire, I’ll eat my way through Italy and go to India just like Elizabeth did.)

Elizabeth quoted life coach Martha Beck (another Oprah columnist and another speaker who I heard present on Saturday afternoon. Martha was fabulous too, but I need another blog post to fully share her words of wisdom.)  Elizabeth said that Martha Beck says there are four kinds of women:

1. Women who chose career over family (not me)
2. Women who choose family over career (not me)
3. Women who choose family and career (I guess that would be me)
4. Women who are ‘mystics,’ those who chose any combination of the three who follow their own path and drown out all the other choices (I want to be a ‘mystic.’  I think I will become a ‘mystic’ during my 50+ years.)

Elizabeth inspired me with her closing words: “I get up every day and do my best with what I’ve been given. I try to do better each day.  I’m not kind to myself.  My head is a neighborhood that you wouldn’t want to be in.  If we are going forward, there will be risks, failure. Have self-forgiveness for not doing well on certain days.”  (Yes, yes, I shook my head, some days I’m really hard on myself too. Okay, most days I set very high expectations and maybe I need to move to a neighborhood more like Dr. Rodgers neighborhood used to be.  Or even to Sesame Street so I can be easier on myself.)

I was so moved by Elizabeth’s words that when I heard she was doing a book signing I went right up to the Barnes and Noble stand at the conference and bought her new book “Committed,” even though I told myself that I was not going to allow myself to purchase any new books at this conference because I have sooooo many new books at home from other conferences that I have not read on my “waiting for retirement” bookshelf.  (But, I decided that, as Elizabeth said, I should not be so hard on myself . So I allowed myself to buy the book. That was an easy decision.) Then I waited patiently on line to get my book signed, as my daughter A went off to wait in line so we would be able to get a seat at the next session with Dr. Oz., taking the camera with her…so I missed the moment to get my picture taken with Elizabeth Gilbert. Oh well.

As I stepped up to the table, Elizabeth commented on the shirt I was wearing. “I really like that teeshirt,” she said.  (I was wearing my “Love This Life” teeshirt with the big yellow sunflower on it.  I thought it was the perfect tee for the day.)  “You do?” I said to Elizabeth, “I love it too.”

Judi

P.S. – Stay tuned for more recaps from the Live Your Best Life Weekend.  I need to get some rest before I share more about what I learned about living longer from Dr. Oz, and what I learned about decorating from Nate Berkus, and what I learned about the 10 Roads to the Right Life from Martha  Beck.  While I did enjoy my weekend in NYC, I got very little shut eye.  I’m just not a good NYC apartment living sleeper like my twentysomething daughter A is.  I cannot sleep with earplugs.  And I cannot sleep with sirens going off at 2:00 a.m.  I’m just a menopausal fiftysomething woman who needs her sleep routine in the suburbs of NJ.  It’s so good to be home, even if my home is no longer an empty nest.

I just finished one of my major work events of the year and I feel like I’m finding my way back to civilization again.  I’m at home today with a sinus infection and my body aches.  I think my body has been telling me to slow down, but unfortunately, I have not been paying much attention. Instead, I’ve been driven to distraction by all the technology and ’to do’ lists that I’ve created for myself.

First, let me check in on my technology:  There’s my personal emails to catch up on.  There’s my work emails to read.  There’s my Twitter account that has not been attended to (wonder how people are following me when I’m not following myself?) There’s my new Facebook page that currently only has a face, but no updates. (I was invited to be friends with a former high school buddy.  Curious about all the other 1975 friends I graduated with, I just had to go on Facebook and check them out too. OMG, is that what we look like 35 years later?)  There’s my Kindle e-book reader that has laid dormant since vacation (Glad I read one book on that e-reader). And, as always, my  blog, which needs tender loving care.

Note to self: Put the red light up. Stop the technology.  Slow down.  Remember what life was like before mobile phones, Blackberries and computers?  I think I need to take a one or two week break and not make myself feel guilty.  Right? 

Instead of reading  all my Blackberry messages, I should let go and be eating all the strawberries that are in my fridge.  I should be making strawberry shortcakes with Cool Whip topping and putting my feet up.

“Mom, you need to chill-ax,” my daughter A said to me this weekend, “Come watch an episode of The Hills with me.” 

“Chill-ax,” I said to A, “What does that term mean?  I never heard of that phrase.”

“It means ‘chill’ and ‘relax’ both at the same time,” said A.

It sounded good to me. I’m so glad my twentysomething daughter can teach her fiftysomething mother how to ‘chill-ax.’

Of course, it didn’t last long.  After The Hills was over, I was back with my ‘to do’ list.  Laundry to wash.  Food shopping to do. Closets to clean. (I did feel good after organizing my spring/summer clothes and packing my winter wardrobe away for another year.  I was good and threw out a few items that I had never  worn this winter.) Two weeks of newspapers to read. (No, I didn’t read all two weeks worth.  As usual, I piled the newspaper pile higher for future reading.) A months worth of magazines to read. (When will I learn to stop subscribing to magazines that I don’t have time to read?  I am a magazine-a-holic! Yes, I’m 50+ and I’m still a magazine-a-holic.  Should I get an iPad so I can keep all my magazines in one spot?)

Note to self: Tear up ‘to do’ list. Okay, okay.  Tearing up the ‘to do’ list may be a bit too harsh.  Maybe I should make a shorter list?  I did enjoy reading the May issue of InStyle magazine this weekend.  I always learn so much about the fashion trends from reading my magazines (watch for an upcoming blog on all I’ve learned about spring fashion trends.) I was pleased to see that the page on ‘your Look At Any Age’ now includes a style for those in their 40s to 50s+.  I did notice that a little + sign was added.  Thank you to the editors for recognizing that baby boomers read these pages too.

So, what am I going to do today to bring myself back from distraction and as my daughter says, ‘chill-ax?’

- First, I’m going to take an afternoon nap.
- Next, I’m going to take a leisurely bath with Epsom salts to soothe my aching bones.
- Then, I think I’ll have a cup of warm tea and a raisin bagel with low fat cream cheese (need to watch my fat content) for dinner.
- After that, I’m going to watch Lady Gaga, who I hope is on American Idol tonight.  She is so great!
- And finally, before I go to sleep, I may have to watch the newest episode of The Hills.  Am I hooked on this show again?  Dare I say so?

Oh, Judi, just ‘chill ax’ and go watch the show, will you???

Judi